Mr. Potato Head Assigned Special Duties

I have made an executive decision, here at Demon Princess Productions, to promote Mr. W. Potato Head (illustration by MoPaul).






Hereafter, Mr. Potato Head will serve as a valuable icon to tip y'all off whenever I catch a politician (any politician) saying or doing something s/he just shouldn't be wasting air or any other precious resource, like our time, pretending that we're stupid enough to take seriously.

Mr. Potato Head's inaugural "event" had to do with former oilmen pretending to have such high principles & complete disinterest in an industry that has, BTW, contributed multi-millions to their political campaigns, that they believe they can credibly lay claim to having ordinary peoples' best interests at heart when formulating energy policy.

And for Bush's great intellectual acuity in pointing out that we can't switch to agriculture-based fuels "because we have to eat some too."

Today's "Mr. Potato Head" goes to George Bush (again) for wanting to waste our time railing against a version of the National Anthem being sung in Spanish.

"I think people who want to be a citizen of this country ought to learn English and they ought to learn to sing the national anthem in English," Bush said."

Bzzzt! Non-who-the-hell-cares-issue, unless you're a racist asshole yourself, or just playing to the less savory "humanitarian" instincts of your more bone-headed base (as we saw, over & over again in your Presidential campaigns).

"Bush made his comments at a Rose Garden news conference [Friday] as a Spanish-language version of 'The Star-Spangled Banner,' hit the airways featuring artists such as Wyclef Jean, hip-hop star Pitbull and Puerto Rican singers Carlos Ponce and Olga Tanon.

"Called 'Nuestro Himno' — 'Our Anthem' — the Spanish version rewrites some of the English version. For instance, the second stanza says, 'My people keep fighting. It's time to break the chains.'

"Monday's planned boycott and the emergence of a Spanish-language anthem are ingredients in a national debate over how to deal with an estimated 11 million illegal immigrants in the United States. It is an issue that has sent hundreds of thousands of protesters into the streets of major U.S. cities to demand the lowering of citizenship barriers. Congress is struggling to deal with the issue, and the House and Senate are moving on opposite tracks."